How many times have you desired someone to show you not tell you? You have grown tired of people telling you what to do, where, and when to do it, but no one is showing you how to do it with love.

            Take, Jill who is nineteen years old and pregnant. This will be her first baby without the hand or help of her sex contributing partner, she is acutely aware of the fact she is a teen in need of show not tell.

            Or take Steve a passionate writer of heart and all he wants to do is birth his style of spiritual philosophies and empowerment as others of old. He cannot accomplish this without an Editor, he humbly agrees show not tell is the best way of learning, love and GROWTH.

            But how easy is it to show others not tell others? I believe most people are told what to do. After all, we live in a world of billboards, advertising, national or state laws, police, peer or parental control. Further, our lives or surroundings comprise of employment policies and procedures, work ethics, study or proposal outlines, instructions and deadlines of all sorts whether employed or unemployed.

            Society around the globe is filled with questions and instructions, how to do this and that, when, where and why whether it makes sense or nonsense. Living can be like military based camps, you are ordered to work and take lunch and when and where to sit and wait.

            Or how many times have you driven through a Big Mac or fast food drive through, you nicely place your order to be told: “Drive Round!” Well, hello, I am already in my car, (you know that) I drove down the interstate and the last thing I need is some wino telling me what to do. What ever happened to customer service showing a smile and the word…"Please"?  

            Even show not tell though literary professionals snorting fire and brimstone demands it, the world at large lacks it. If told what to do most of your life at home, school, work and church, you will naturally tell not show or write unto others.

            So, what does it take to reverse the historical and social trends of telling others what to do? Here are my seven steps of SHOW NOT TELL:

1. First, try to forget YOU
2. Put yourself in the place or position of others
3. Try not to use words such as have, must, tell, do, want you, told you, now etc.
4. Always be kind and courteous
5. Be inviting yet instructional
6. Be positive, know your subject, information or job well
7. Think SYS – See You Soon.

            Imagine the above ingredients in your workplace, home, marriage, mind, or personality. I believe these attributes can only spread colorless love and repeat business all year round.

IT IS SUMMERTIME –

            Not summertime online, the one who breathes fire whilst teaching show not tell – she actually triggered this article, I am really practicing SNT as I write. I figured I might as well show others as I improve my coaching and writing skills online.

           It is summertime and we need summertime words, smiles and expressions of kindness. Yes, the fire of training, education or criticism, though painful and challenging at first moves you out of complacency to growth.

            Perhaps your company or relationship could do with some sunshine! Perhaps a good place to start is SHOW, NOT TELL. Surprise someone today approach them differently. Checklist your words exchanged and shown to others. Aim to improve every experience, thought and conversation. Delete people of harmful substances and behaviors.

            Challenge yourself, set new goals daily! How will you know your true character if you fail to examine yourself or observe others? If your husband or wife is screaming "HELP!" It may be worth listening to the silent screams of his or her soul. If you REALLY do care, can you ever say no to someone you declare to love or believe in?  

LOVE OTHERS MORE THAN YOURSELF:

Let us examine further the seven steps of SNT:

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*TRY TO FORGET YOU, this is not easy. Whether serving a customer, friend, spouse, stranger or enemy, putting your self last is the furthest from your mind. Summertime hammered me to fifth-grade and still she was unsatisfied. She mentioned: “Over-sensitivity” Could this be the guard? It is not easy allowing someone to strip you down when you have never met them in person. This is proof I was willing to listen and allow summertime a chance of proving herself of mind. There is no harm in positive criticism. You may have to sit and ponder: are these words positive or negative. If unsure, test them over a day, week, or so. I believe relationships, communication and love is a never ending life-cycle or learning process of development, launch, decline and maturity. The more you forget you the more you will take on your true customer service role, parental duties, directorship, self-discovery and fruitfulness unto others.   

*PUT YOURSELF IN OTHERS – to serve someone is to allow others to serve you. They serve you information or request for your timely and professional response and action. Sounds like a win-win exchange. However this requires both parties to be courteous, friendly and inviting. A tearful or angry adolescent will not calm down or confide in anyone they cannot trust. If you want others to feel safe and sure, without danger or overexposing yourself, attentive listening and testing what you have heard or learned of others, is a good start. Try to see each day as what can I learn from my spouse, boss, employees or friends? Make it exciting and try to turn a bad situation into positive merits of growth and love. Consider those less fortunate than yourself and perhaps you may just see how blessed you are.

*TRY TO LIMIT WORDS: NOT, TOLD, ORDER, MUST, TELL – These words among others build walls and war between people. I believe we are all guilty of using destructive words of communication. After all, God is perfect. We are here on earth living in a world, oftentimes confused, blind, and lost. How many of us believe we love others? Who wants to serve others more than ourselves? Surely, we can use our words to always serve others. The least we TELL others and ask or SHOW others the better we become. I am sold out on SNT that I will ask my forever Wife to SHOW me how to love you. I will not feel ashamed to declare over forty I am in need of you showing me how to love you. I understand for some, this is risky as your husband or wife could take advantage of you. Guidelines are always useful in planning and communication.   

*ALWAYS BE KIND AND COURTEOUS: Again easier said than done for it takes the removal of self, ego, fear, doubt, replaced with positive communication. This is a test of your ego will you sit back and allow others a gift from your expertise, company or heart to feel overjoyed and want to return? How valuable are customers or peace and happiness in your home? Without the removal of ego, you will never achieve HARMONY or CUSTOMER SATISFACTION. Show not tell – is the way forward for prosperity and benefits of love for all.

*BE INVITING NOT DEMANDING: To expect others to be and do as you are demands of individuals change. What you communicate in a moment or an hour could destroy your partner, friend, spouse, mother, father, daughter, son or stranger for life. One negative statement or message could destroy ALL hopes and dreams a person mustered up in the silent corners of their spirit. Further, to think everyone is bold…is unwise. Many people hide behind masks, even summertime acts as if she has it all together, so why are you profiling online? As for checklist dating SHOW NOT TELL. Perhaps we all need to rewrite our websites or profiles, and invite and show others what benefits they can receive, should they take the time to contact. Demanding checklists is enforcing your woeful brain cell on others. In fact, much of what you desire is what YOU have never done. Invite people with a smile. Try to lure with a card, gift, donation or encouragement as love is always GIVING.

*BE POSITIVE – KNOW YOUR SUBJECT, INFORMATION OR JOB WELL: No matter what others say, you can be anything you believe of God. This is the One Universal Law you do not need endorsed. I had to say goodbye to summertime. I could not get one word of hope out of her mouth. Summertime reminded me of Hitler’s agony aunt. I only had one long day online in the life of summertime and boy...it felt like a thousand. Summertime knew her subject well, but her ears and heart was deaf to the sound and position of others. To cannon blast anyone is to drive them away. Who wants to learn from inconsiderate intellect? Show your love and I will gladly listen! Being loving or positive only requires determined action and thought. You can choose to be positive all day everyday, you just need the right words, material or hope. This is why information is key! The Internet is full of useful tips on how to do most things. Still time alone is where YOU versus YOU begin. You may have to walk the walk alone. This is the real test of your stamina, self-esteem and an empowered mind – WITHIN. 

*THINK (SYS) - SEE YOU SOON: If we all thought, see you soon - this would open the door to more customers and friends. See you soon, sounds a great way to invite someone back again. This is not harmful or invasive. See you soon, sounds healthy marital or customer service words. Perhaps your business, relationship or marriage needs marketing. I can hear the laughter and words…”Marketing?” Yes, how have you marketed or profiled your wife or husband? See You Soon, is a great way to market yourself to your husband, wife or customers at large, try it today and send an email or link replying what SYS has done for you.